I’m in day 11 of my homespun soul care staycation, a restorative journey for body, mind and spirit weaved in and out of my day to day life. I see this open-ended self-care adventure as a body pampering, wisdom-giving, faith-building, joy-seeking, branch-pruning incubator, with God as my Shepherd leading me beside still waters. It’s also an inner pilgrimage of sorts as I prepare for hearing God’s call during a transitioning in my career and preparing for an impending empty nest when my son graduates high school next spring. (sigh)
Such intentional self-care – the benefits of feeding our body healthy foods (yes, I’m drinking green smoothies everyday), nature walks, daily practices of calming our minds, silent retreats and deepening our lives with God – offers multifaceted benefits we can’t always realize in our routine lives.
On day 1 of my staycation, I had carved out an hour to sit by the lovely community pool tucked in a cul-da-sac under a circle of palm trees in our neighborhood. How lucky, I had the place all to myself. Opening Thomas Merton’s book, Life and Holiness, I read, “an activity that is based on the frenzies and impulsions of human ambition is delusion and an obstacle to grace. It gets in the way of God’s will.”
How often we live from frenzied minds and impulses, rather than following the true guiding of the spirit where true vitality and joyful living is born.
I wanted more to know the will of God leading my life.
By day 3 I’m irritated, with a flurry of allergies and weariness. The following days I’m more rested and purposeful – releasing worries and concerns, praying more deeply for God’s will. I realize, of late, my mind stuck in a rut, seemed to spin round and round like a tire stuck in mud. Giving myself walks on the beach, nurturing activities like baths and sipping tea while journaling felt hard. I only offered myself the smallest nurturing gifts like reading for hours in the evening stretched out on the couch, which I never do, worth a million dollars.
I will refresh the weary and satisfy the faint. – Jeremiah 31:25
By day 7, I’m more aware of people around me, my intuitions as sharp as a magnifying glass. I’m taken aback by jealousies and competitiveness between high school theater parents in my community, noticing how such human tendencies are microcosms of world wars, culprits suffocating joy, love, and peace. I pray for these people, the world, for transforming my own flaws, removing planks in my own eyes before trying to remove splinters from the eyes of others.
By day 9 I’m realizing motherhood burnout is real. Resisting another chore, making another meal, driving, driving, driving, I’m experiencing care-giving, housekeeping, food shopping, cooking overload. Healthy frozen dinners will suffice this week.
I also know my overload is nothing compared to the caregiving of others in much more demanding positions.
Return to your rest oh my soul. – Psalm 116:7
Jesus, the ultimate caregiver, often went to quiet places to rest.
And so, I pray more deeply until light breaks through like dawn. A shift happens, my mind more free and awake, is less foggy, more receptive for God’s will, for noticing God’s grace all around me.
God’s grace is sufficient.
I return to trust in the words of Jesus, “I came that they may have life and have it abundantly.”
One of my day 11 staycation activities included a long, early morning hike today with my husband at Daley Ranch, a 3,058 acre conservation area just 20 minutes from home. Refreshed from fresh, sage scented air, the quiet of the mountain and it’s vast green beauty, I felt held in Sunday’s arms. On the beginning of the hike, I picked a bunch of sage. It’s fragrant, dusty, desert scent, reminded me of our early years as parents taking frequent, peaceful hikes in the sage filled Santa Barbara mountains, our then toddler son with his wild brown curls peaking from under his tropical printed surfer hat, in a backpack on my husband’s back. We loved hiking, but hikes have been rare these past years. The hike this morning helped us remember who we once were, and are. We stopped often along the trail, thanking God for these moments together, of our love sometimes buried under toil and stress, of the beauty of the landscape.
Yesterday, instead of our planned staycation activity of going to the desert, we changed plans when we heard the fall desert weather was over 90 degrees, treating ourselves to a local day spa – a delayed celebration for our 20th wedding anniversary. Eight hours pampering our neglected bodies with spa delights — eucalyptus steams, saunas, hot tubbing, soft, healing music in the background – soothed over-barraged senses. My husband enjoyed hot tubbing with other men, each daring the other to dip in the neighboring ice cold tub, while I relished in reading a good book, soaking in unusual solace, and frequent trips to the sauna and steam room.
My heart warmed watching my hard-working husband stretched out like a beached seal on a comfy lounge chair in a white terry cloth spa robe, sipping lemon water infused with green tea extract, a spa special, relief oozing from inside – out his weary body.
In the finally purge in the steam room, I realize soul-care isn’t always about neat, pretty pampering. Soul-care God’s way sometimes means lifting the lid off of our pain, being receptive to God’s miraculous healing in order to become more Christ-like. This may mean facing submerged parts of ourselves in steam rooms. Even on my glorious spa day, pain showed it’s face.
Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you
– Isaiah 49:1-
Almost unbearably hot eucalyptus scented steam jutting from jets, settles it’s heavy layer upon my skin, penetrating deep into my pores. Droplets of steam sink into hidden places like tiny submarines in search of sunken treasures. A weighty sweat pours out invisible toxins, along with emotional pain from somewhere deep and intangible.
I think of Jesus healing Mary Magdalene of seven demons. I think of my mother, afflicted with mental illness, it’s impact on me, the fear and shame, tiny traumas and huge tragedies. But, I’m ready now, God doesn’t give us what we can’t handle. I’m ready to face this old layer of wounds buried in my soul like sediment rock, the fossils of pain imprinted in the hollows of my heart. I’m also ready for God’s supernatural healing, opening the way for new life.
Jesus said, “Truly, truly, I say to you, unless a grain of wheat falls into the earth and dies, it remains alone; but if it dies, it bears much fruit.”
Pain sweats from my pores, big aches dripping onto the wooden bench. Dying.
Breathing hot eucalyptus fog deep into my lungs settles my soul into a resting place.
By the end of the day, with our minds like ducks swimming on a quiet, mountain lake, and bodies limber and loose, we showered, slobbered on fancy spa lotions, got dressed, and then strolled holding hands through the resort’s town square under elegant palm trees glistening with white lights above. A band on the restaurant’s patio played easy rock music as we stopped to sit on a rock wall watching pregnant moms running after toddlers, young couples dancing, lights twinkling, stars beyond shining, awakened to the utter beauty of these simple glistening moments.
Joy lives all around us under stars, in our neighborhoods, in our midst– it’s only our minds, our stresses and worries, and the demands of the world that block our views.
Incubated within a soul-care staycation, I felt God in my every breath, in the warm California air on this beautiful night, in my husband’s hand I held, in the shining eyes of the tiny baby in the stroller, in his sweet, pure smile, in the kiss the little toddler gave when I bent down to her size, in the happy Shih Tzu puppy surrounded by children.
Although I’ve yet to venture on a silent day retreat seeking to deepen an intimate relationship with God, and to continue the unfolding care of my, mind and spirt, joy peaked from behind the curtain of my soul care staycation today, and I’m feeling the blessings.
You anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows.- Psalm 23:6
WE LOVE YOUR COMMENTS!
Sharing today with #smallwonders and other lovely blog linkups!
Here are my personal take-aways from your soul care lessons:
the Shepherd leads us beside still waters and
even Jesus took time to go to places away from others, to renew.
Will I follow His example (and yours)?
your neighbor at Testimony Tuesday
Hi Constance, I’ll take-away your simple take-aways! As we abide in God, following Jesus’ example of resting, we reap much fruit. So glad you visited!
Sounds as though your staycation was a goodie. Time with Jesus? It’s always a goodie. And the one thing that especially resonated w/me was the comment about theater parents. Nodding my head, folks everywhere simply need Jesus. It never dawned on me that our kids’ Christian school would be a mission field. The same need you experienced with theater parents is evident in my kids’ school as well. It’s amazing, isn’t it? So thankful you’re setting them before God in prayer. I’ll do the same.
Yes, time with Jesus..and needing Christ as the center of our lives is what we most miss when we are weary, jealous, etc! I’m so interested to hear how even in your kid’s school how theater parents are competitive! I have a pastor friend who left his church in an affluent town to work with homeless folks. But knowing some of those in the church, I told him those in the church needed him more! My son has been struggling with Christians who he says are fake..Sadly, I really understand what he means..so happy you visited Kristi, I’m really taking in your words!
What a wonderful intentional decision to make for yourself! So thankful you are enjoying yourself and feeling the peace of Jesus!
Blessings and smiles,
Lori
Thank you so much for the encouragement! I also just read your blog today..what rich reminders to remember our true selves as children of God! (I’m having trouble figuring out how to leave a comment on your blog).
Have I told you lately how much I adore your words? Your heart? Your message? When I come here, I soak in all of those things… and it fills me, feeds me, and inspires me.
It calms me, helps me focus on such significant parts of who I am and where God’s truth slips into the corners of my world and my perspective- ultimately opening up more paths to walk down in my faith journey with Him.
Thank you- for blessing me always with both Godly comfort and wisdom.
You are my soul sister and such a great encouragement Chris! I cannot tell you how touched and blessed I am by your encouragement. Thank you, it means the world that my words behind this computer somehow reach deep and inspire — I couldn’t ask for more! I feel the same about your writing, Chris. It makes the time and effort writing so worth it when we can share in such profound ways! I look forward to our continuing journey together!
I have been enjoying the insights from your staycation – and more – your attention to soul care. Seeing that you have been reading Merton, you may enjoy this short note re: Life becomes a Prayer: https://rhfoerger.wordpress.com/2015/05/22/life-becomes-a-prayer/
Peace to you.
Rusty, I’m so glad you visited and grateful to hear you have enjoyed my soul care journey. Ah, Merton’s ‘Life becomes a Prayer’ is beautiful. He profoundly influenced my spiritual journey after reading “Seven Storey Mountain”! I will visit your link soon! I’ll look forward to it!! Peace to you, as well!
My dear Kathy: It is a beautifully courageous exercise to allow time to go deep inside. You so perfectly articulated your journey this week, how each day of your soul care unpeeled an additional layer of the process of going deeper: enjoying beauty of nature, annoying allergy symptoms, sadness at dark side of theater community, restlessness in process of finding peace. I love that you and Simon took time to be together in nature and in pampering to celebrate your love. I know that there is so much in our lives that is out of our control. I find the best way to remain in peace amidst the chaos is to take daily time in prayer and meditation. Even if we feel restless or annoyed during prayer time, I know its value. I see every moment we take to connect with the Divine as gaining spiritual strength which serves as armor to support us through life’s chaos. I have always loved the phrase: “Let me be a channel of your peace. Where there is hatred let me bring your love.” A nice daily mantra for me.
Ahh, beautiful Theresa. Thank you for your words of acknowledgment and understanding the struggles depths of this spiritual journey!
You are so right..Prayer and meditation time are the cornerstone of our balance, offering peace, wisdom and divine strength to be in the world.
‘Let me be a channel of your peace’ is a beautiful daily prayer. Your humble, kind presence is missed in the theater department! Truly! You’re a blessing Theresa!
I’ve often been discontent that I couldn’t travel like I had planned for retirement. My husband has no desire to leave home. Now that he has cancer (in remission now), he wants to be near his doctor if anything goes wrong. Your “staycation” is an ideal way for me to enjoy the beauty of the area I live in and find time to just “be” and not focus on the tasks of running a home and working on my writing. God desires that His children be refreshed and satisfied in His Son. Simply embracing my circumstances and resting in Him is the answer to being content and at peace. The spa time sounds very tempting to relax my body totally and give healthful benefits as well.
Kathy, I’m so very glad you visited and so touched that the ‘staycation’ idea will help you fill the empty place where travel isn’t as possible as you’d hoped during retirement. I am very excited you’ll carve out special time to enjoy the area where you live, and possibly a spa day, free from the routines, to be with God, to dwell in loving Jesus. Blessings, I’ll be praying you’ll enjoy some special time!
What a treat for you and your husband. I’ve been longing for some pampering lately and your post helps me remember my husband probably needs it too. This line, “Soul-care God’s way sometimes means lifting the lid off of our pain . . . ” is so very true. Thanks for linking with #SmallWonder!
Hi Kelly, As parents we often put ourselves on the back burner. Intentionally carving such special time with our spouses is really a treat which we all deserve. Our staycation spa day and hike truly nourished us! I hope you and your husband will plan a special time of pampering and soul care!
This was beautiful! I love your intentionality in this! Your words, peaceful and soothing to me this morning.
Your neighbor at Tell His Story
XO
Tammy
Thank you for visiting Tammy! So blessed to know my words brought peace this morning!